The state of things

So I planned this blog post basically as a big whinge about my life and how I am feeling. Personally I hate when other people do this, it is so obviously a narcissistic act for attention, it makes me laugh at them, then pity them,then laugh some more. This may sound horrible (and yes it actually is) but who announces a facebook friend cull, does it, then announces on other social media and blog posts that the people they deleted were “fake friends” and not real anyway? Idiots! That’s who! Did you think that we wouldn’t see it? Argh!

Anyway truth be told my feelings have been more down than up lately, my grand plan is pretty much flushed down the toilet, so what have I taken away from this? I can NEVER make grand plans, they rarely work, and it is high time that I learned this and moved on with my life and not be disappointed.

So much has changed, the scope of what I thought I wanted to be doing, where I want to be is all rapidly shifting around me and I feel like I am in the middle saying “slow down there! I am not ready for this yet!” but it still keeps turning.

I know that I have people to reach out and talk to about this, but I feel like I have exhausted these people. Whenever I talk to them all I am doing is whining and complaining and I HATE being “that guy”. Professional help? Yeah I am going back to it but it doesn’t change much.

I shouldn’t blog when i’m pissed off, and this one won’t be posted to Facebook or Twitter for this reason I just had to do this for myself as I am finding this soothing. I have to make over my soul not for anyone else, but for me.


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